Yesterday evening Dan had a "Daddy Moment" ..... but it was one with a bit of a surprise twist !
The family occasionally still get "Daddy Moments" (well - that title is reserved for Jess, Gina & Dan) so rather "Mark Moments" for the rest of us ! These are not always sad or tearful, sometimes they can be a happy memory... not always an actual memory... but usually something about Mark that we feel the need to share.
Dan was having a couple of drinks with his best buddy (Kieran) and for some reason they and Greg were having a discussion about death - I am not sure if it was about death or dying itself, or how their conversation took place and evolved but, suffice to say, Dan came in a few minutes after this conversation and just announced to me that he (& Kieran) thought I was amazing for all that I had gone through and done and yet managed to keep him and his sisters on "the right track".
I was dumbstruck .... very touched .......
Now I do know that any 19 year old lad who may have had a drink - will often declare their love for everyone ... but honestly .... he was not that drunk yet he felt it was important enough to come in from the garage to let me know how he felt - with some genuine emotion in his voice.
Of course that set me off - a poignant moment between Mother and Son.
I reminded him that many people were involved with us during their childhood and that without family and friends supporting us we may not have been as fortunate as we are but he reiterated that ultimately the responsibility for their upbringing was mine and that even though I had learned my parenting skills from my parents - in my children's situation, I was the Mum AND the DAD !
He said - it is only as he gets older, that he is realising how hard that must have been - even though many people have to go through something similar with divorce - for most, the father is still alive and around in some aspects, but this was not for him or his sisters.
So, I humbly accepted his acknowledgement, hugged him ............. and saved my tears of pride in him, for when he had gone back out!
You did a brilliant job Jane and the family are a credit to you. You brought them all up very well and had to cope with your own grief too. The children were so young they wouldnt remember very much about Mark but you have kept his memory very much alive. Dan's praise is very much deserved and you should be very proud of all that you have done. Well done Dan for telling you how he felt at that time and well done to you for the last 20 years
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Thanks Carol and thanks for being part of those years - the church family helped a lot x
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