I wish I knew then .........

.......... what I know now ........ would I have done things differently? ....... actually YES.

I don't have regrets - as one of my previous posts states - but that is because you cannot regret something if you did not know about all the options available at the time, but yes, if I had the knowledge (and hindsight is a wonderful thing) I think there would have been some things I did differently.

I would have spent MORE money on my trip to Fiji - trust me - I got into BIG trouble back then, in the mid 80's -  with my credit card going over its limit and ..........worse .... the bank contacting my father !!!!! 

That would seem inconceivable now and I should have ripped into the bank seriously, for breaching confidentiality BUT 25 years ago .... that was not something they seemed to be worried about .... and when I look back now, I paid it off..... but just felt humiliated by the whole procedure ... leaving me, with a real distrust of banks and bank managers !

I would have questioned authority MORE - not just teachers, policemen, politicians but all those so-called experts out there, who are just NOT experts ! They may have more experience than most people in certain subjects and they may give good advice in certain things, but teachers and textbooks and all these others are not infallible - NONE of us know all the answers (well ..... with the exception of my Mum who, much to my annoyance, is quite uncannily right most of the time!)

In fact I think my main issue is that I have followed certain patterns of life - and still do - almost unquestionably - and yet time and time again we are shown that things are not all they seem. 

Of course there are many "stories" out there, where we do not know or understand the issues (the Hillsborough incident is certainly one) and yet we take for granted that the "powers that be" (politicians/governments/police/the IMF/educational establishments etc) are "right" .......... and we allow them to instruct and govern us.

I have a friend who is currently home schooling her children and my sister-in-law did this too for a while - I wish I had thought of this option - it may not necessarily have even been right at the time and who knows .......... I may have done a rubbish job .......... BUT - I didn't even realise this was an option ! 

I just went along with the norms of society and took my children to school. Yet lately I have really questioned school techniques - are they getting it right ? Not all children learn by sitting at desks as many of us know ..... but are the schools providing enough options for learning through other methods? Even the best ones are limited by resources!

I now know, that ultimately, whether you have GCSE's, A Levels, NVQ's or whatever qualification ..... it really does not matter that much - several successful people I know left school with none of these - one of whom even decided that he could not be bothered with his Maths exam so he simply counted the number of bricks in the exam hall and put that number at the top of his page!! Yet his numeracy skills are excellent and he is now in his 40's having held down well paid jobs and provided very well for his family.

However, let's face it, in another 20 years I will have even more experience under my belt, probably more knowledge (about things that interest me so I find out more) ..... and I will be saying this all over again...........

Is that what they call WISDOM ???

An Eventful Year

Today is my anniversary -  I have been blogging for a whole year !

I decided to post this as "An Eventful Year" because when I started this project, I was out of work and not a grandmother ......

Then my thoughts wandered a little and I looked back on my life since I moved out of the family home at aged 23 and set up home with Mark ..... I realised that, actually, according to  the stress level scale of Holmes & Rahe .... this has in fact been one of my quieter years !!!

Since I moved out in 1988 ..... I have only had 3 years where my stress factors have not reached the level (on this scale) of illness ....... NO WONDER I GET MIGRAINES LOL !!!

2001 & 2002 were fairly calm (although I was living with a control freak and the domestic situation was beginning to fall apart) and 2006.

YES - that is it - 3 years out of 24 !!!!

If you are familiar with this Stress Scale it does include the good events too - getting married, Holidays and Christmases (yes they can cause stress - check out my Christmas posting about decorating the tree !).

However, there is always a balancing side to the scale ...... a Ying to the Yang .... right now I am at home, typing this in the sunshine (and glorious sunshine it is) with a sense of peace and calm ... listening to the water in my pond bubbling away .... could it be any better ?

I think when they calculated this list they acknowledged the other factors in life that off-set the level at which there is a high risk of illness ..... the calmer side of life .... your environment and your support networks... your natural resilience, even whether you are an optimist or pessimist must make a difference ! Hence the scale only states that the RISK of illness increases ..... not that you WILL have a physical or psychological breakdown

Whatever the reasons for each individual dealing with their own stresses I believe wholeheartedly that I have been lucky enough to have a lovely home environment, a supportive family and a faith that lets me just say ... 

"OK .... that was tough .... but it will get better and easier !"

Here's to the next eventful year !!!